i heard angels late last night...

we come from the land of ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs blow

2006-05-06T20:09:00.000-07:00

is that a seal or a piece of wood?

Okay so does that look like a dead seal to you? Because it does to me. I got as close as I could to it and I still could not tell. It was kind of funny to see all these people walk on the beach and just stare at it. I wanted to touch it with a pole or something, but my sister wouldn't let me and I did not know why she wouldn't let me. Then she told me yesterday that it was because if it was a dead seal and it had been there for a while the pressure could have made it explode. Needless to say I was happy she didn't let me touch the seal (or wood- still not sure) because that would have been disgusting. Ewww... I don't even want to talk about it anymore. Jaclyn and I really thought that it was a seal, but no one would believe us... so now we will never know. It so looks like a seal though.

On another note the Lakers lost by thirty-one points tonight. Now I am a huge Lakers fan, but I am also realistic. I didn't really think that they would win, but to lose by thirty-one points is just ridiculous.

dear sir can you remember me? i'm the one that picked the apple tree

2006-05-05T20:51:00.000-07:00

a mom and her daughter playing on the beach on Easter

So I am finally back. Nothing gets me back from procrastinating on my blog like procrastinating from studying for finals and packing for summer. I promise to blog more this summer. So here are some things that I have been up to.

What I am listening to: Led Zeppelin- Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You- has an eerie feel to it that makes you think about things. I'm pretty sure I could listen to this song over and over again.

What I am reading: Articles about Islam and nonviolence for a paper I have to write. The articles are really interesting. Its a shame that people don't understand the nonviolent aspect of the religion and only focus on it's extremists.

What I am thinking: I am thinking that I cannot wait for summer so my sister and I can throw a "ring of fire" party.

What I am doing: Trying to pack and study which is easier said than done because I don't want to do either.

a wise man once told me don't argue with a fool, cause people from a distance can't tell who is who

2005-09-18T22:34:00.000-07:00

me and kira with flagstaff behind us

"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens."
-Jimi Hendrix

since then it's been a book in reverse, so you understand less as the pages turn

2005-09-16T16:17:00.000-07:00

i was trying to take a picture of buildings in chicago and anthony-ray yelled at me to hurry up and i got scared.

So I love that this semester I have classes that I love to go to. It's about time, that's all I have to say. It's so funny to think that I am actually excited to write a ten page paper for my race and ethnic relations class. I am going to write about how images of African American hip-hop artists changed as they struggled to become a part of mainstream music. And then the other day I found myself excited to take my contemporary arts and culture quiz. I was like I know this stuff and I love it. I love looking at slides of arts that pushed the envelope and helped to change the world to how we know it today. I am just extremely happy that I love my classes this semester even though i have a lot of them. Well to end the week, I will leave you with a list of songs that I love at the moment.

1.) Dare- The Gorillaz
2.) What Are You Afraid Of- West Indian Girl
3.) We Used to Be Friends- The Dandy Warhols
4.) Trees- Marty Casey
5.) Pink Bullets- The Shins

don't hurt yourself, take it easy, there's no better time than right now

2005-09-12T18:12:00.000-07:00

emilie, me, april, and anthony-ray outside the aquarium in chicago.

So I'm finally back people. I know its been a long time since I updated, but I went home for the summer and my computer was messed up for most of it. Summer was good too, I went to Chicago to visit my cousin who goes to school there. I had never been before so it was really cool to see the city. Chicago is a great city, I was amazed with the architecture and the things to see there. I can't wait to go back again. So now I'm back at school in Flagstaff, Arizona. I live in an apartment now and I have my own room which is nice. School is going well, I have been busy with reading though because I am taking 19 units, but I should be alright. So in between all the reading I will be updating way more, I promise and I'll post even more pictures.

So I really like to watch the show RockStar:INXS, and this one guy Marty Casey has an amazing song out called Trees, check out some of the lyrics:
i don't want to go through this life
without you by my side
and i've got it all worked out in my head
this is how its got to be
it'll be you and me up in the trees
and the forest will give us the answers

well the sun's gonna rise in a mile, you'll be feeling fine, in a mile you will see, you'll be out of the dark

2005-05-04T18:02:00.000-07:00

me at the grand canyon in february... sooo cold

So it is reading week. And I only have two more classes tomorrow and then finals starting on Tuesday. So this week has been full of reviewing, cleaning my room, and preparing for finals. And yes that is as much fun as it sounds, yeah not really. I'm so mad at one of my professors at the moment. I dragged myself to his class, only for him to be ten minutes late and then not review because he felt that not enough people particiapted in last week's class. Yeah, what a waste of time. Like I don't have anything else to do, but go to his class only to leave after fifteen minutes having not learned anything. Goodtimes. But on a better note I think that I am in good shape for my finals, the only downer is the fact that I have three finals on Wednesday. That should be fun.

don't come down, things will always work out, so when you find yourself in tears

2005-04-29T18:37:00.000-07:00

i had a picture of bella and besos, so here is little jazzykins.

So next week is reading week. Which really means nothing. I think it is supposed to be a week were you have no class and get to study, but at my school you still do have class and can still learn new material and have tests. So it is just like any other week, except for the fact that it is the week before finals. Finals... ah finals. Something that you know is coming, but never expect it to come so soon. I was watching an old tv show about kids in college and it, of course, was about finals week. The characters were complaining about how much work they had to do. And then I got to thinking about how much work I still have left to do. I felt very overwhelmed. Then something weird happened... I just started laughing. Like hard core laughing, like my sides hurt and I can't breathe laughing. This would not have been so weird if it was not 2 in the morning. My roommate was up studying and she was just looking at me like I was crazy. But I could not stop laughing. Once I did though, all I really wanted to do was cry. I didn't because I didn't want my roommate to think that I was weirder than I am. But that was the craziest feeling ever. I just felt helpless, like there was nothing I could do. So woohoo finals are around the corner... luckily I have something to get me through them. I get to come home and see my family soon.

now i've been happy lately, thinking about the good things to come

2005-04-25T23:32:00.000-07:00

baby besos

OK, here is my real list of what I miss when I am away at school. It's short and simple: Besos and my Uncle Ron. Here are a few fun facts about them:

1.) Besos' eyebrows (she is very serious)

2.) Uncle Ron's "What's going on?"

3.) Uncle Ron's liking "good tunes"

4.) Uncle Ron's "good flicks"

5.) Uncle Ron's sleeping during the "good flicks"

6.) and my favorite saying: shank you for the besos, Besos

So there it is...

paper pen and a piece of your heart, i can read it but where do i start?

2005-04-21T18:36:00.000-07:00

baby bella.

So its almost Friday... woohoo. That makes me happy. I cannot believe that the semester is almost over. It went by really, really fast. So I have two weeks of class left, and then a couple days of finals and packing to come home. I cannot wait to come home, there are so many things that I miss. My family and friends (of course), Los Primos, Rockin' Baja, my room, Bella and Jazz, good radio stations, good sleep... this list could go on forever. So hopefully I get by the rest of the semester with little trouble.

Here is a song that I really like right now. This is an artist that I do not normally listen to, but I really liked the lyrics and could relate to them.

Elsewhere- Sarah Mclachlan

i love the time and in between
the calm inside me
in the space where i can breathe
i believe i have wandered
to touch upon the years of
reaching out and reaching in
holding out holding in

i believe
this is heaven to no one else but me
and i'll defend it as long as i can be
left here to linger in silence
if i choose to
would you try to understand

i know this love is passing time
passing through like liquid
i am drunk in my desire...
but i love the way you smile at me
i love the way your hands reach out and hold me hear...
i believe

i believe
this is heaven to no one else but me
and i'll defend it as long as
i can be left here to linger in silence
if i choose
would you try to understand

oh the quiet child awaits the day when she can break free
the mold that clings like desperation
can't you see i've got
to live my life the way i feel is right for me
might not be right for you but it's right for me...
i believe...

what an amazing time, what a family, how did the years go by?

2005-04-18T19:44:00.000-07:00

me and kira over spring break in laguna beach.

So there is less than a month left in the semester and I was thinking about the summer. Here is a list of things that I want to do this summer:

1.) decorate my balcony

2.) buy an easel and paint more often

3.) read more classic novels

4.) hang out with my friends and family

5.) learn more about producing music

6.) take more pictures and try out new photo techniques

7.) finally get rid of clothes that I know I will never wear anymore

8.) learn how to make tortillas

9.) try to wake up early and run almost every morning (I hate to do it, but I always love how I feel and how my day goes when I do)

10.) write more (short stories, poems, thoughts)

I will keep you posted on whether or not I accomplish these things.

talk to me, dance with me, here in the spotlight

2005-04-14T15:22:00.000-07:00

sunset in beautiful laguna beach.

So when I come home for the summer to Southern California, I am gonna die from the heat. I just know it. Today it is a lovely 65 degrees in beautiful Flagstaff. Yeah 65 degrees sounds perfect, I know, it used to sound perfect to me too. That was until I came to a place like Flagstaff, where it snows. Now the perfect temperature for me is like between 30 and 40 degrees. It's crazy, I know, but I am used to the cold now. It is 65 today and I was sweating, so weird. So when I talk to my family at home and they say it has been in the 80s and 90s, I just do not even know what to think. My mom came to the conclusion that I need to wear heavy jackets out here so that I will be used to the weather when I get home. Yeah I will probably get some weird looks for that, but hey, whatever you gotta do.

So after that random rant, I thought I would share the song lyrics to a song that I am really liking at the moment, check it out.

Hard to Find- American Analog Set

we stay hard to find
'cause it's too hard to take it
and we keep that in mind
that we're older and jaded
we can't shake it

pacific and eastern we're bordered and hated
so we stay hard to find
'cause it's too hard to take it
no, we can't fake it

if i could go back in time, i would give the wide world just to change your mind

2005-04-12T09:47:00.000-07:00

the beautiful staples center at the nba all-star game last year.

A couple of years ago if someone were to ask me what my dream in life was I would say that I wanted to play basketball more than anything in the world. That was my dream, I loved the game, it was as plain and simple as that. It's a weird feeling when you realize that your dream will never happen. I would say that I realized that I would never accomplish my dreams in basketball by the end of my sophomore in high school. Although, I realized this I did not allow myself to let it completely go until my senior year. I used to have dreams all the time where I would be doing the simplest basketball drill, were I would execute everything perfectly. But then it would come time for me to shoot, and the ball would be so heavy that it would always fall short. Looking back now, I think that the dream was telling me that it would all be over soon. The game that I love so much would not be a part of my life anymore. I would have to move on. I have spent countless hours thinking that if I was a couple inches taller, a few steps faster, or if I was given more chances to prove myself that I would still be playing today. But there is nothing that I can do about that now. I think that writing about it allows me to put the past behind me. I have always been a dreamer and the thing that scares me now is the fact that I lost that. I try to pretend that I still have it, but I know deep down that I don't. I lost my dreams on that dreaded day in October 2003. For the first time in my life I am truly lost and do not know what I want to do. Hopefully, the fact that I have finally allowed myself to say this out loud will give me the push to discover what I was destined to do.

but what you've done is put yourself between a bullet and a target

2005-04-10T15:12:00.000-07:00

pretty clouds and buildings in new york.

Yeah so this week I have four tests. Two tests on Tuesday and two more tests on Wednesday, oh and I need to register for classes. So this week should be fun. I don't know why this always happens... I always have like a couple of weeks of nothing then, boom, I have four tests in one week. I think that having four tests in one week is really messed up, but ehh, what can you do? I guess study, so that is what i have been doing, studying. But there are only four more weeks of classes and then a couple days of finals til summer... so if I remember that it is almost over then I think I will get by. So happy week everyone, and hopefully I will talk to you once this crazy week is over.

don't let me hear you say life's taking you nowhere

2005-04-07T17:03:00.000-07:00

me and my sister, jaclyn.

I couldn't think of anything to write about, so here are a few songs that I am quite enjoying at the moment and the lyrics in them that mean something to me:

1.) Holdin' On- Bullets and Octane
"i heard angels late last night
right before the morning light
whispering they talk to me
what i can't hear
they show me"

2.) Powerless- Nelly Furtado
"paint my face in your magazines
make it look whiter than it seems
paint me over with your dreams
shove away my ethnicity
burn every notion that i may have
a flame inside to fight"

3.) The Blower's Daughter- Damien Rice
"and so it is
just like you said it would be
life goes easy on me
most of the time
and so it is
the shorter story
no love, no glory
no hero in her sky"

4.) Silence is Easy- Starsailor
"silence is easy
it just becomes me
you don't even know me"

5.) Goodnight, Goodnight- Hot Hot Heat
"so goodnight, goodnight
you're embarassing me
you're embarassing you
so goodnight, goodnight
walk away from the door
walk away from my life"

6.) Re-offender- Travis
"going through the motions
but i'm fooling myself
i'm fooling myself
you say your sorry's
and then you do it again"

7.) Waterfall- I-94
"if i walk away
would it be the same?
if i was afraid
would i find a way?
if you fall through my hands
like a beach full of sand
would you still understand what i say?
you shower me with love
and i wonder why"

8.) Muzik- Knoc-turnal
"my music, my life,
my heart, my soul,
my music, my everything,
i gave my all"

9.) Don't Come Down- Obie Trice
"let's get closer, so regrets never approach us
don't come down, things will work out
so when ou find yourself in tears
don't come down, things will work out"

10.) Bottom of the Bottle- Smile Empty Soul
"you always call me
and ask me how i make it through the day
i'm always fallin
i guess it's just God's way of
making me big"

... some good songs, check 'em out...

sometimes our only way is jumping, i hope you're not afraid of heights

2005-04-05T23:06:00.000-07:00

The sun setting over down town L.A.

So this whole blog thing is new to me, but my sister is always telling me that I should start one, so here I am. I am currently a sophomore at Northern Arizona University in Flagstaff, Arizona. I love it up here, it's so beautiful with the mountains and everything. Being away from home has been a lot harder on me than I thought that it would be. It has been challenging at times, but I think that I am doing well under certain unseen circumstances. I am majoring in criminal justice and have a double minor in sociology and ethnic studies. At times I feel as if life is moving by so fast and I am just standing there in the shadows waiting for something to come along. I don't know exactly what I am looking for, but I am determined to find my own way.